Today is January 21, 2025, a Tuesday. I’ve been reflecting so much on a daily basis, and it feels like a shame not to record these thoughts. So many precious moments go undocumented—moments that are worth capturing, worth documenting.
Eann’s Illness and Our Trip to the Clinic
Something very interesting happened today. My son, Eann, has been unwell. I first suspected he had a fever on Saturday night when I came home. By Sunday morning, I gave him paracetamol, and although he seemed fine during the day, his fever returned at night. He has also been coughing for a long time now, which is concerning.
This morning, I decided to take action. After dropping his brothers at school, I decided to bring him back to the car, even though he was already in his uniform, ready for class. I called him, saying, “Eann, get back to the car. I’m taking you to see a doctor.”
We often joke about doctor visits meaning injections, so on the way to the clinic, I heard him crying quietly. When I asked what was wrong, he said, “I’m scared. I don’t want to get an injection.” What a sweet, innocent boy. I reassured him, saying, “Don’t worry, Eann. We’re not going for an injection, just some medication.”
Eann’s Profound Question: Why Do Humans Need to Die?
While waiting in the clinic, Eann asked me a deeply profound question: “Daddy, why do humans need to die?”
Wow. Profound. It reminded me of the time when I was a child and had similar questions about life and death. This is such an important question because it separates those who think deeply about the meaning of life from those who don’t. It’s a question that pushes us to seek deeper understanding, to look beyond just living.
I felt a tinge of sadness knowing that, one day, Eann will face death, as we all will. But that’s not the point. Life isn’t about anticipating the end; it’s about living fully. I was glad he asked such a meaningful question, even though he doesn’t yet have the answer.
I patiently explained to him about the concept of life and death and how humans are made up of three parts: body, soul, and spirit. I told him, “Our body will die, but our soul will live on in another form.”
He then asked, “What happens after we die?” I shared our faith’s belief, explaining that we don’t believe in reincarnation, although we sometimes joke about it. Instead, we believe in eternal life. While I don’t fully understand this yet, this belief shapes how we live in the present.
I explained, “It’s not about proving which faith is superior but about how your belief makes you a better person. Does it help you live with purpose and empathy? Does it make you the kind of human you want to be?” For me, this belief has helped me govern my thoughts, develop empathy, and focus on finding purpose in life. This is what sets humans apart from animals. Animals care about survival, but we seek meaning.
Reflections on Artificial Intelligence
Eann’s question also made me think about artificial intelligence (AI) and its implications. Many people fear that AI might surpass humans, but I don’t believe so. AI can replicate knowledge and intelligence, but it can’t replicate humanity. It lacks the essence of who we are—our body, soul, and spirit.
AI might take over tasks and skills, just like tools we already use, such as calculators or cameras. But it’s just a tool.There’s no need to fear it as long as we remember that it can’t replace what makes us uniquely human.
A Meal with My Parents
After visiting the clinic, I took Eann to his grandparents’ house. We had a meal together, which was rare but wonderful. I hardly get to eat with my parents due to the busyness of life, and this incident served as a reminder to prioritize such moments. I’ve decided to make time for a weekly meal with them. Moments like these are precious and shouldn’t be taken for granted.
My Birthday Wish and Luke 22:42
Eann’s profound question also brought back a personal reflection. A few days ago, a good friend asked me, “What’s your birthday wish?” At the time, I said I didn’t have one, which was expected. But this morning, I recalled Luke 22:42: “Father, if You are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but Yours be done.”
This verse resonates deeply with me because, if I were to rank the areas of my life where I’ve invested the most effort, marriage would be at the top. For me, marriage has been my cross to bear.
The Challenges and Purpose of Marriage
I am blessed with a very independent wife. Without her, I doubt anyone else could handle my lifestyle or personality. But our differences also make marriage challenging.
I work hard at my marriage, not just for personal fulfillment but also to be a blessing to others—newlyweds, parents juggling work and family, and people navigating similar challenges. At its core, my purpose in marriage is simple: I love my wife.
However, our differences require constant alignment. Over the years, things have improved, but I often long for deeper connection and meaningful conversations. My wife, on the other hand, tends to withdraw when she feels insecure. This contrast makes our relationship challenging, but I remain committed because of my faith and belief in a higher purpose.
Struggles, Faith, and Authenticity
In my darker moments, I’ve prayed to God, asking Him to remove this burden. I’ve even said, “Lord, if You allow, please take this cup of suffering from me.” But I always end my prayer with, “Not my will, but Yours be done.”
This belief in God’s sovereignty keeps me going. It prevents me from making impulsive decisions, such as ending my life. Instead, it helps me surrender and trust His plan. When I wake up each morning, I choose to live fully—as a father, husband, leader, and servant. I live each day fully until I go to sleep, hopefully cheerfully, but not always at my peak.
Even when I feel down or depressed, I turn to God authentically, saying, “Lord, if possible, let me not wake up tomorrow morning. But I won’t take my life because not my will, but Yours be done.” This relationship with God has allowed me to let go of my burdens and live a more fulfilled life.
Embracing Life’s Unique Path
Everyone has their cross to bear, and comparisons are pointless. Each of us has a unique path, and the key is to embrace life fully. I’ve learned to value every breath, live with purpose, and view life as a blessing.
This reflection—prompted by Eann’s profound question—has been deeply meaningful to me. I’m grateful to have captured these thoughts.
Leave a Reply