The Leadership Lesson of Shared Roads

A Close Call on the Roundabout

It was just another morning. I was driving my children to their swimming lesson, using the car ride as I often do to talk about life. As I approached the roundabout, a car suddenly cut across three lanes without signal. In a split second, it was about to collide with us.

My reflex kicked in. I stopped immediately, even while mid-sentence with my children. The car swerved past. My kids screamed in shock, then sat still in silence. And in that silence, I felt something shift.

I was grateful. Not because danger had appeared, but because my children experienced it in a safe way. Now, when I say “danger,” they know what it means. It is not just a word. It has weight.

Two Days, Two Lessons

The very next day, it happened again. Another car drifted into my lane. This time, the driver was likely distracted by his phone. Once again, I reacted quickly, steering away to keep us safe.

My children, again, asked: “Why do people drive like this? Are they drunk? Are they careless?”

They wanted to speculate. They wanted to blame. But I told them: “It doesn’t matter what the other driver was doing. What matters is that I hold the steering wheel. My job is to keep you safe.”

And in that moment, I realized these near-accidents were not coincidences. They were reminders.

The Road as a Shared Space

The road is a shared space. Everyone comes with different destinations, purposes, and styles. Some drive fast, others slow. Some are buses, some are lorries, some are motorcycles. Some follow the rules, others bend them. But for this short journey, from one roundabout to the next, or from Johor to Kuala Lumpur, we must share the same basic behaviors to keep everyone safe.

The same is true in leadership and life. Families, organizations, even nations are shared spaces. We all come with our own stories and exit points, but for the time we journey together, shared understanding matters.

Fun Facts on Driving Cultures

Different cultures shape how we drive.

• In India, Egypt, and Vietnam, honking is part of daily life,it is a language of the road.
• In Sweden, on the other hand, you’ll rarely hear a horn. Drivers trust rules, not noise.
• Japan is one of the safest places to drive, not because drivers are perfect, but because respect for order is ingrained.
• In Australia, everyone drives at the same speed. Go too slow and you’ll frustrate everyone. Go too fast and you’ll stand out immediately.
• In Singapore, precision rules. Delays are costly, so honking comes easily in moments of stress.

The rules may be similar across countries. Left-hand or right-hand driving aside, traffic lights, signals, and roundabouts exist everywhere. But the culture, the way people actually behave varies widely.

And no matter how much I wish, I cannot change the culture of another country. I can only adapt and hold my own wheel.

Lessons from the Swimming Pool

The same lesson showed up later at the swimming pool. My son was upset because the coach pushed him aside to protect his younger brother. He felt it was unfair and didn’t want to apologize.

I told him: sometimes we say “I’m sorry” not because we are wrong, but because we care. When someone is hurt, even if we didn’t cause it, we say sorry to show empathy. Leadership is the same. It is not about proving who is right, but about choosing to restore relationship.

Another day, I reminded him about honesty. I told him that when I make mistakes, I apologize to him even though I am his father, even though he would not notice otherwise. Why? Because honesty is not about being caught. It is about being true to yourself, to God, and to the people you love.

These are not small lessons. They are foundations.

Where Is My Hand?

After the second near-accident, I asked my children a question: “Where is my hand?”

They looked puzzled. Then I answered for them: “My hand is on the steering wheel. That is what matters most.”

I cannot control if another driver cuts across or drifts into my lane. I cannot predict every move on the road. But as long as my hand is firmly on the wheel, I can respond. I can act. I can keep us safe.

This is the essence of leadership too. Not speculating on others, not blaming culture, not wishing for a different road. But holding the wheel you are given and taking responsibility for those entrusted to you.

The Reverse That Redefines It All

At the end of the day, leadership is not about perfection. It is not about predicting every risk or avoiding every storm.

The opposite of leadership isn’t losing control. It’s letting go of the wheel.

Because losing control can be recovered. You can regain balance, realign, and keep moving forward. But letting go entirely means abandoning responsibility. It leaves those who trust you exposed.

So whether on the road, in the pool, or in life, the lesson is the same: hold your wheel. Stay present. Lead with responsibility, not speculation. That is what keeps others safe, and that is what makes leadership real.

Step 6. Categories & Tags

Categories:

• Purpose of Life
• Building a Thriving Family
• Impacting Lives
• Building Stellar Series
• Leadership Reflections

Tags:

• Road Reflections
• Shared Responsibility
• Parenting Lessons
• Leadership Ownership
• Presence Over Performance
• Safety and Responsibility

Would you like me to also draft a LinkedIn-style headline + caption version (more conversational, hook-style for scrolling audiences), or just keep the legacy-blog format?