The
Reluctant
Leader

Blog

Day: July 22, 2025

Superpower Activation

I once wished for invisibility, yet life demanded visibility. What I feared most became the very ground where strength was forged. Superpower activation is not discovered in comfort, but in struggle. Victory is not about escaping weakness, but about being transformed through the weight of responsibility and calling.

I Have a Dream… Not a Daydream

One conversation in 2018 taught me to think global and act local. Another in 2019 gave birth to Stellar’s vision. A third in 2025 reminded us we are dreamers. Dreams cost sacrifice, but conversations spark them. One insight can change the course of a life forever.

Teaching Obedience vs. Nurturing Heart

For Purposebility blog, LinkedIn, or newsletter promotion. It only took 10 minutes. But in that brief moment, I stopped teaching obedience and started nurturing their hearts. Because a well-behaved child can still grow up selfish. But a loving child? That’s legacy. This is the one thing I hope my sons will carry forever: love one another.

From Private to Communal

I once believed privacy was strength and independence was freedom. But crisis taught me the opposite. Community is costly at first, it asks for vulnerability, contribution, and commitment. Yet over time, it multiplies joy. The opposite of community is not loneliness. It is self-preservation.

The Hidden Curriculum of Foon Yew

Foon Yew’s hidden curriculum was never in textbooks. It was lived in wet markets, fundraising drives, and banners carried with pride. At 18, I thought I was invincible. At 38, I learned that true strength is humility. The question at 60 will be: did we live without regret?

Protected: The Math of Generational Legacy

Six disciples stretched me, but six is addition. Twelve is multiplication. Legacy is not built on numbers you manage, but on lives you multiply. Discipleship is messy, exhausting, yet full of joy. Easy has a cost. Multiplication is the math that outlives you.

Forced Break to Move Forward

Momentum can be your best friend or your worst enemy. That is why I practice forced breaks: barbecues I do not naturally host, workouts I do not always feel like, pauses I sometimes resist. What feels forced today creates freedom tomorrow. Forced breaks are not weakness. They are wisdom.

Why Effort Creates Real Joy

Joy does not come from shortcuts. It is born from effort, grit, and the daily choice to persist. Parenting, marriage, faith, even play all require work. The paradox is simple: what is hardest is also what is most rewarding. Effort creates real joy, and that joy becomes legacy.

Hold Your Steering Wheel!

On the road, one thing matters most: where your hands are. Twice in two days I avoided accidents, not by honking, but by holding the wheel steady. Leadership is the same. You cannot control others. But you must own your steering wheel. That is responsibility.

Mission Impossible

Time flies, legacies don’t. True leadership is not about adding followers but multiplying leaders. The 3M and 3C frameworks remind us: Choose wisely, Connect deeply, Commission boldly. The opposite of discipleship is not neglect but self-preservation. Multiplication makes Mission Impossible… inevitable.

Dream vs. Daydream

Daydreams cost nothing, so they fade. Real dreams demand sacrifice, so they endure. What feels like a distraction: children needing help, parents needing time, a spouse needing gentleness, is not pulling you away from your dream. They are your dream. Legacy is built not in illusion, but in costly consistency.

What Is Impact? Multiplication, Not Addition

Impact is not addition. It is multiplication. A career, a marriage, even a house purchase, none of these matter if they end with you. True impact begins with identity, anchors in purpose, and multiplies through others. Without multiplication, legacy vanishes. With it, transformation outlives you.

Vulnerability as Superpower

Superman’s true power was not invincibility but humanity. Vulnerability builds trust, even when it risks betrayal. In leadership, parenting, and legacy, our kryptonite is not weakness but self-preservation. When we admit mistakes, embrace imperfection, and face our fears, we discover the strength that truly changes the world.

Fear vs Value-Driven Choices

Fear never truly disappears. But values can overrule it. Bezos framed his choice through regret, Collins reframed fear with bold vision, and Mother Teresa admitted fear yet chose dignity. The opposite of fear is not courage. It is clarity of value.

From Victim Mindset to Mastery Mode (Self-Awareness)

True strength isn’t loud. It begins with self-awareness, the courage to stop blaming and start owning. Suffering doesn’t guarantee success; it only becomes fuel when transformed. And the highest stage of strength is not power at all, but Sage Mode: a life both full and free.

The Johor–Singapore Border: Curse, Blessing, or Both?

The border is our mirror. Singapore’s rise began with ownership, not resources. Johor’s future will be shaped the same way. Our greatest risk is not losing people to higher pay, but keeping them without purpose. Ownership today will set our trajectory for decades.

Die to Self. Live for Impact

The greatest sacrifices are not the dramatic ones. They are the quiet choices no one sees, saying no to self so something greater can live. Die to self, not to disappear, but to make room for a life that becomes the cause itself.

Just a Manager?

You do not need a title to lead. From my college days organising the largest event in campus history, to Paul shaping a national education movement as a secondary head, the truth is clear: leadership begins the moment you stop waiting for permission.

From House to Haven

A house becomes a haven when we stop guarding it as a possession and start stewarding it as a gift. Intentional living is not about perfection but about choosing connection over convenience, trust over fear. Your home can shape lives for generations if you let it.

Purposebility: Set Goals. Find Purpose.

Purpose is not a treasure buried far ahead in your journey. It is a seed you hold in your hand today. Most think they must find purpose before setting goals. The truth is the opposite. Purpose emerges in the motion of doing. Set goals. Find purpose.